Permissible but not Beneficial

In Paul's first letter to the Corinthians, he addresses a question he received concerning food offered to idols. When this letter was written, people had invented a so-called TJ Maxx of meat distribution. After food was sacrificed to a pagan idol, it could be sold at a cheaper price than if you bought it straight from the butcher. One group of Christians thought it was sinful to eat this 'defiled' meat and the other group figured it wasn't a big deal because idols aren't real (and a good deal is a good deal, am I right?) 

We love approaching a wise person and thinking a black and white question automatically renders us a black and white answer. Paul goes beyond their surface level reasoning and goes straight to the heart of the matter. He basically says: Who cares? Food doesn't bring me closer to God and neither does abstaining. But if eating this meat or not eating this meat causes someone to stumble, then I'll be a vegetarian the rest of my life. This life isn't about what you can get away with without sinning. 

I recently finished a month long fast. It all began when I started combing through areas of my life that I thought were weak. I noted what I did in my free time and where my 'daydreams' took me when I let my mind wander. I noticed a trend, or a correlation, if the nerdy behavior analyst in me speaks up. When I was free to do whatever I wanted or think about whatever I wanted I noticed I enjoyed planning for a life that hadn't started. What I mean is that through blogs, books and podcasts I learned how to:

Set boundaries with the boyfriend I didn't have

Submit with love to the husband I didn't have

Involve my friends in the relationship I didn't have

etc.

etc.

I love to read blogs and books about seeking wise relationships. These things are good, right? They are created to encourage me as a single woman to chase after relationships that edify Christ.

The great Matthew Henry says, "Those who allow themselves in every thing not plainly sinful in itself will often run into what is evil by accident, and do much mischief to others." 

After much prayer, I realized that these things were worth abstaining from, because they often caused me to think too much about the future. It was one thing to desire a relationship or marriage, but another when my 'prepping' became a way for me to ignore the life I had right in front of me. So, I pulled the plug. I put away all the books, turned off the sappy songs, deleted all the podcasts and unsubscribed from all the blogs. I missed Taylor Swift within 24 hours, I will admit freely. 

Paul says, "Knowledge puffs up, while love builds up." 

I had the knowledge. I had done my research. Searching for knowledge had become a sort of idol that could've been potentially destructive for my future relationships. So, for a month I loved God and the people I do life with, by passing on anything relationship or romance related. It was hard and sometimes it felt legalistic. But thirty days later- it was to my greatest benefit. I realized there are so many other things to read and think about. I realized I wasn't as interested in a relationship as I thought. When his Word was my only 'advice column' or 'how-to' book, I was amazed at how life-giving the scriptures are. Most importantly, I realized God was working through me in bigger ways than I knew. It took abstaining from a permissible thing to see where He was and how I could join Him.