He Washed My Eyes With Tears

This is a poem that I read via Josh Harris' website.

He washed my eyes with tears that I might see,
The broken heart I had was good for me;
He tore it all apart and looked inside,
He found it full of fear and foolish pride.
He swept away the things that made me blind,
And then I saw the clouds were silver lined;
And now I understand 'twas best for me,
He washed my eyes with tears that I might see.

He washed my eyes with tears that I might see,
The glory of Himself revealed to me;
I did not know that He had wounded hands,
I saw the blood He spilt upon the sands.
I saw the marks of shame and wept and cried,
He was my substitute for me He died;
And now I'm glad He came so tenderly
And washed my eyes with tears that I might see.

by: Ira Stanphill

God gives us tears for a good reason. Our pain is not in vain. He uses it as a tool to teach us. It seems strange to our simple human minds, but in the end it will be our crowning glory.

I can say what I said above, but at the same time I question: "How can my broken heart be good for me?"

L.B. Cowman says,

" The soul that is always lighthearted and cheerful misses the deepest things of life. Certainly that life has its reward and is fully satisfied, but the depth of its satisfaction is very shallow. Its heart is dwarfed, and its nature, which has the potential for experiencing the highest heights and the deepest depths, remains undeveloped. And the wick of its life burns quickly to the bottom, without ever knowing the richness of profound joy."

I like the wording she used. I think it's strange that she says a lighthearted soul is shallow. I don't think I've ever thought of it like that. I always believed a lighthearted soul was a good thing. What I think she is saying is that without sorrow or pain, we cannot learn certain lessons or characteristics of God's love. We know all about how to praise him when everything is great............but what happens when life takes a bad turn? How does God look upon those who are in a dark place?

"Blessed are those who mourn."

We are blessed for mourning. We are blessed for being in pain, but not giving up. He loves us when we are at our lowest, so we can cling to him even tighter.

In order to have a well-developed heart we MUST go through dark times. We must endure and look for God through our tears and despair. We can't wallow in self-pity, but look for the lesson so that when our trial is over (and it WILL end), we can have JOY.

Don't forget- Job is famous for his afflictions. We know him only because of the strength and perseverance he showed when God took away everything from him. Take courage that someday people might find encouragement from learning of how you fought the fight and did not lose hope when you were in your darkest hour.

The Refiner's Fire

A smooth and transparent piece of silver starts out as a rough and jagged metal. It's natural form is not attractive, and it must be wielded over a hot fire to be made into beautiful jewelry. When a silversmith is refining silver, he purposely puts the piece he's working on where the flames are hottest, in order for the impurities or "dross" to be melted away. The silversmith also must keep careful watch over his piece of silver while he is working on it. He can't leave it for one second or it will be ruined. He watches over it, so that it will look exactly how he wants.

"See, I have refined you, though not as silver;
   I have tested you in the furnace of affliction." Isaiah 48:10

This is what God is doing in me right now. I am being painfully refined in the furnace of affliction. From the outside it looks as if I have been forsaken, but my silversmith is still watching over me. I've finally realized that pain is not the absence of God in my life, he is merely squeezing my hand a little harder. In fact, pain is the reality that I proven faithful enough for God to test me. He knows that at the end of this road is a green pasture if I would only stay close to him while in the dark valley. There are certain things you can only learn about God while in pain. The mountain is wonderful, but I become more like Christ while in the dark valley. If I were to look back at my short life I cannot find a lesson I have learned through easy circumstances. Times of happiness and easy living are a nice break, but without the storms my character is weak and untried. When I am in the furnace of affliction, I am in almost continual prayer with God. When I am on the mountain, I don't need him as much. God knows I will slowly decay and rust without my spirit being constantly fine tuned.

Another verse that speaks of being "refined" is found is Psalms, and ironically is a psalm of praise!

" Shout for joy to God, all the earth!
 ² Sing the glory of his name;
   make his praise glorious.
³ Say to God, “How awesome are your deeds!
   So great is your power
   that your enemies cringe before you.
⁴ All the earth bows down to you;
   they sing praise to you,
   they sing the praises of your name.”
 ⁵ Come and see what God has done,
   his awesome deeds for mankind!
⁶ He turned the sea into dry land,
   they passed through the waters on foot—
   come, let us rejoice in him.
⁷ He rules forever by his power,
   his eyes watch the nations—
   let not the rebellious rise up against him.
 ⁸ Praise our God, all peoples,
   let the sound of his praise be heard;
⁹ he has preserved our lives
   and kept our feet from slipping.
¹⁰ For you, God, tested us;
   you refined us like silver.
¹¹ You brought us into prison
   and laid burdens on our backs.
¹² You let people ride over our heads;
   we went through fire and water,
   but you brought us to a place of abundance." Psalm 66

My sole comfort while I am in the fire of affliction, and the hope that encourages me not to let my circumstances defeat me, is the "place of abundance." The silversmith doesn't leave his silver over the hot flames forever. He only leaves it there until it is ready for him to wield into the shape he wants. God is keeping me in the fire of affliction so he can make me into a beautiful piece of silver. God is making my soul so luminous, that when he finally takes me out of the fire, he sees a reflection of himself.

Where Were You?

Matt Maher is a really cool musician. He sings a song called, "You Were On The Cross" that I really like. This is one of my favorite lines,

" Where were you when sin stole my innocence?
  Where were you when I was ashamed?
  Hiding in a life I wish I had never made.....

  You were on the Cross..."

This song always brings painful thoughts about my sin to the forefront of my mind. It's that sick feeling of guilt when you realize what you've done. For me- it comes right when my sin feels the most pleasant. The moment when I've already ignored the Holy Spirit's whispers in my ear....then I feel it. The dreaded guilt...the "how could I have done this...or thought this...or wanted this?" The voice in my head says, "Why can't you get this right?!" "Why are you always making the same mistakes?!" Like David did....I try and hide my sin from God. I am flippant about asking for forgiveness. Sometimes I don't even ask. I just tell myself I won't do it again.

But God knows. Oh yes- he knows more than I think he does. However, his intent is unlike Satan's. Satan wants to "kill and destroy" me. He relishes in my guilt. It encourages him. God's purpose in convincing me to ask for forgiveness is not to make me feel guilty. He just knows how guilt bears down on us like a heavy weight, and doesn't want us to think we are required to carry it.

When Jesus was on the Cross He felt all the sins of the world on His shoulders.

The sins of the murderer. The sins of the child molestor. The sins of the addict. The sins of the adulterer. The sins of the deceiver. The sins of the liar. The sins of the betrayer.

What that must have felt like! We talk on and on about the crown of thorns and the nail pierced hands, but what about the inner turmoil? What about the spiritual slaughter He went through for us? I believe that was the most difficult part of Christ's crucifiction. A man of no sin, now carrying every sin ever commited.

Oh, that I would remember that when I am on the battle lines of temptation! Let me refrain from sin out of thankfulness. Out of gratitude. And when I do sin, let me approach the throne of Grace and Mercy quickly and sincerely.

Consuming Fire

Wildfires are rampant across Texas right now. The drought our poor land has gone through has been terrible these past months, and now fires are burning us to the ground. Wildfires are extremely tricky and difficult to put out. As I've watched the news the past few weeks talk about the devastation they are doing to people's homes and land, I remembered this description of God:


"For the Lord your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God." Deut. 4:24

God describes himself this way when he is forbiding the Israelites to worship idols. He meant what he said too.....the Israelities were punished severely for going against the covenant they made with God. Our God is not to be trifled with. I think this upsets many people. They think they want a God who is like a grandfather. You sit on his lap, he tells you stories, maybe scolds you a little about not telling a lie, and then doesn't really interfere with your personal life. They certainly don't want a jealous God. That kind of God is frightening.

But God knew that. He knew that we could not possibly contain Him, or approach Him, or conceive Him, or understand Him. He knew that as the Creator of the entire universe, our minds could only comprehend His majesty and glory so much. He knew that even if we tried our very hardest, we would still fall short. He knew the Israelities would not keep their covenant with Him that day. He knew.

And that is why he also knew he had to do something. He knew we could not be in His presence, so he had to send someone to save us. He didn't just send anyone either. God's unfathomable love for us compelled Him to send His son. Hallelujah....what a Savior!

Now- we are all conquerers! Christ's blood was the bridge over the Great Divide between us and God. We can approach him and be forgiven of all our sins. He loves us more than we could ever ask Him to.

The question remaining is: what about the God of the Old Testament? What happened to Him when Christ came?
The answer is that the God of the Old Testament is still very much alive. He is still Holy, and he is still reigning supreme over all life. He is still a Consuming Fire. The people that want the "grandfather God" are missing out. They are putting God in a box and presenting him as something human-like. I do not want to worship a God that I can fully describe or fathom. I want a God who is looking out for my best interests, even if it goes against what I want. If I am going to place my entire life in the hands of a God- I want a God who is feared and a God that is eternal.